If you are in immediate danger dial 000
Hide my screen
Am I being abusive?

See below to find out if you behave this way toward your girl/boy friend.

DO YOU:

  • restrict his/her contact with other people?   
  • restrict his/her time away from you? 
  • get agro if he/she doesn’t agree with you and do as you say? 
  • physically harm your partner (eg. hit, slap, push) ? 
  • damage your partner’s personal belongings? 
  • deliberately hurt your partner’s pets? 
  • tell her/him what to wear? 
  • belittle and say nasty, derogatory things including put downs about her/him in front of others?

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you could do with some options to turn your relationship into a healthier and happier one.

Help and support is available. Take the first step and pick up the phone and call one of the useful contact numbers on this website.

About Tom's Story
Tom’s behaviour is not ok - he is being abusive. No one has the right to bully anyone else into doing things they don’t want to do. This is not a healthy relationship and Karen did the right thing by leaving. Karen wasn’t prepared to be bullied or controlled and was lucky enough to pick up on the signs that something was wrong and did something about it.

Unfortunately, for lots of girls this doesn’t happen and they feel trapped in abusive relationships, even experiencing severe physical abuse at the hands of their boyfriends.

THIS IS NOT OK.

 

Tom’s story

"When Karen and I got together I was so freaked out because she is so hot and the other guys always look at her. It made me feel kinda special she picked me and I noticed I was more popular around the other guys and this made me feel great.

The trouble with Karen is that she is always around other people, always laughing and just wants heaps of people around her all the time. You’d think if we were going out together she would want to spend more time with me and less with them. I told her not to see so much of them and she just laughed at me.

I was so angry she did that. She doesn’t listen and just ignores me. Well there’s no way I was gonna take this so I told her she can’t see her friends when it suited her and she needed to pay more attention to us than
them. She just said she wasn’t gonna do as I said, that she would see her friends when she wanted to – that it was none of my business. You can understand why I had to get tough with her can’t you?

I mean like she’s got no right to ignore me … anyway I needed to show her who’s boss and came down a bit heavy with her - y’know nothin’ bad, just some pushing and slapping to teach her a lesson. Guess what! She
left me, didn’t she. Couldn’t believe it. She had me to take care of her, she didn’t need all those other losers. Well, I hope she gets what she deserves one day.